Yep, I was duped by a seemingly homeless person. I’ve done it one other time for sure, and probably more. I don’t mind being out a buck or two, since the majority of people I meet are just plain hungry. I thought I had pretty good radar for fakes, but this guy had a great game.
I drove up to an intersection. A guy was sitting on the ground on the corner with his head bent down and his hand over his head. His other hand propped up a sign with a cross drawn on it that said “Homeless and Hungry. Anything helps. God bless.”
I thought, oh, gee, poor guy. I decided to make his day by going to the Safeway on the opposite corner to buy him food. I thought baloney and bread would be good, so I stopped at the deli window to see if they had any mayo or mustard packets. It was after 9 p.m. and the food was covered with little plastic blankets, but a guy came out from the kitchen. He looked around, but only saw what I did: salt and pepper and forks. “Thanks for looking!” I said.
I discovered that baloney only comes in packets of 30+ slices, so I got a couple of those slim packets of sliced meat: turkey and honey baked ham. I found a pallet of white dinner rolls on the remainder rack. Like baloney, you can’t get ten slices of “American cheese.” It comes in packs of 50, so I settled on an 12-pack of store brand colby-jack. I found the tiniest squirt bottle of mayo, but it was still the most expensive item, until I picked up a cold gatorade. Oh, and a banana. I hadn’t planned on shopping, but I got myself a large tub of Fage yogurt, my favorite.
I asked the checker for an extra bag because most of it was for a homeless guy I saw. “He was in pretty rough shape,” I said. She smiled at me in approval, said it was nice of me.
Back in my car, I transferred the homeless guy’s food to a plastic Target bag with handles and looked in my wallet. I was thinking I’d give him a five or even a ten, but I only had four ones and a twenty. I wasn’t going to give him twenty.
I drove back to the intersection and turned around so I was heading in the right direction. I pulled up and said, “I’ve got something for you,” but he didn’t look up. I put on my flashers and got out of the car. He still didn’t look up. I walked over to him and said I’d brought him some food and a little money. I handed him the four dollars and the bag. When he looked up I could see he was a clean-shaven, young white guy. When I got back in my car, I saw him put the money in his pocket and look in the bag. He didn’t take anything out, not even the drink, just put his head back down in the exact pose he’d been in before.
Shit. I’d been had. I drove away feeling dumb. Well at least him and his buddies will have something to eat. I wouldn’t be surprised if he lived in the apartments on the same corner.
The worst part was that I gave food to a dude who wasn’t hungry, when I could’ve given it to someone who was. I drove back around thinking I’d ask him if I could have the food if he didn’t need it. But of course I didn’t stop. He might deck me–I could see the headline: Woman Beaten While Stealing Food from Homeless Man.
He was still there with my cheery bag of food next to him when I drove by. I saw him stretch and then curl back into his pose.
I believe I had a positive effect on at least one person–the store clerk. It’s proven that people will act kinder after witnessing a kind act. And even though I was suckered out of about twelve bucks, I’m grateful I have twelve bucks to give away. I didn’t use to.
[An example of when my generosity worked was this winter. It often hovers around freezing on winter nights in the desert and I wanted to ease people’s suffering. I bought winter hats and thick socks at Walmart; and single-serving boxes of tuna and crackers at the Dollar Tree. I put the socks and tuna in the hat and handed them out to people out in the cold. Getting socks was like hitting the jackpot for some of them. I had to quit doing it because I spent too much! I recommend giving to others, how ever that works out. It’s a win-win, unless . . . see this post.]